Movie Tagline: Skate or Die
Gleaming the Cube is, I'm guessing, not a very well known movie. Featuring Christian Slater as a no-good skater punk who ends up exposing a gun smuggling ring with his sick skating moves and uncanny detective abilities, it is most definitely not a hidden gem. The plot is ridiculous, of course, and some of the stunts are equally unbelievable, but if you are into 80s movies (for the sake of nostalgia or ridicule), you will find plenty to enjoy about this movie. Even the title is goofy and made up. That link shows some movie listings and reviews from a newspaper in 1989 that are pretty entertaining in their own right. Die Hard received four stars, of course, but good old Dead Ringers, which we at Cinemarone have already paired, did not fare as well, garnering only one-and-a-half stars. Apparently the film critic for The Spokesman-Review back then wasn't into movies featuring phantasmagoric gynecological equipment. Also playing in January of 1989: Alien Nation, Child's Play, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, The Land Before Time, Rain Man, Scrooged, and Twins. Anyway, Gleaming the Cube is clearly not the best movie about skateboarding, even if it does feature Tony Hawk and Tommy Guerrero. If you are looking for a good movie on the subject, I would recommend either Lords of Dogtown or the documentary Dogtown and Z-Boys. But it is an entertaining popcorn movie that doesn't take itself very seriously, which is a staple of these kinds of 80s movies. It isn't out to reinvent movies; it just wants to show you how one might change the world through skateboarding. Simple. Send Help, from 4 Hands, is also not interested in reinventing things. Made in collaboration with Send Help Skateboards, this beer is a crushable, dry-hopped blonde ale that doesn't try too hard to be anything more than that. Not everything has to be a Heady Topper or a Good Morning. Send Help is more concerned with being consumed in bulk while having a good times outdoors. Crisp and clean, light and refreshing, this is what a blonde ale should be. But this one has the added bonus of a subtle yet full flavored hoppiness that elevates it above the others. Sometimes the simplest pleasures are the most rewarding. I believe that's what they call "gleaming the cube".
0 Comments
Movie Tagline: There's one in every family
I don't think anyone will argue when I say that Black Sheep is not Chris Farley's best movie. It's awkward, and not always in a funny way. It's also really dumb, but that's not a big shock, either. But it also keeps trying to shoehorn in some sappy sentimentality, which is not only unearned but also pointless and clumsy. Tommy Boy it ain't. At least in that one there was some genuine, earned emotional catharsis in between all the stupid gags and fat jokes. It was a dumb movie with enough heart to make it transcend its own juvenile spirit. Black Sheep tries for the same thing and doesn't quite pull it off. Maybe it's the supporting cast, which substitutes Tim Matheson for Brian Dennehy, Christine Ebersole for Bo Derek, and Gary Busey for Rob Lowe. Or, hey, maybe it's just not a very good movie, and that's it. It may sound like I don't like Black Sheep, but it's one of those movies I saw as a kid that I continue to enjoy despite its shortcomings. I know it's a bad movie, but it's still entertaining. Gary Busey's crazy schtick is funny, and David Spade hadn't quite reached the levels of self-parody we get from him these days. And, more than anything else, it's still a Chris Farley movie. Farley was more than capable of selling a premise as stupid as this one. He could elevate the worst of material with raw talent and sheer enthusiasm. And, even though it's not her best work, either, director Penelope Spheeris (Wayne's World, The Decline of Western Civilization I-III) is somehow able to make this movie seem better than it actually is. Along those same lines, Baba Black Lager is not the best Uinta beer out there. They have plenty of other beers that blow this one out of the water. But it's still good enough to seek out. It is smooth and robust, with enough roasty malt character to boost the light body of the lager and make it a thoroughly satisfying black lager. It works well with Black Sheep because of the name, of course, but it works on a deeper level, too. Black lagers, or schwarzbiers, are an outlier as far as German beer styles are concerned in that they share a lot of flavor components with stouts and porters, which are ales (and, as such, are not beers associated with Germany in the least). They are light-bodied like other lagers, but the similarities pretty much end there. So, they are in the lager family, but they don't really fit in there. They are the black sheep of lagers. Baa baa. Get it? Have I run that idea into the ground thoroughly enough? Good. Maybe I can get a gig writing comedies for David Spade. Does anyone know if Happy Madison Productions pays well enough to justify the soul-crushing experience it must be to work for them?
Movie Tagline: From the Dark Side to Our Side
Grigori Rasputin was an influential figure in Russia in the early 1900s. How much influence he exerted over Nicholas II, the last Tsar of Russia, is uncertain, but the upper class in Russia at the time were not keen on a peasant being so close to the imperial family (he was much loved by Empress Alexandra as well). Rasputin was supposedly poisoned, shot in the head, bludgeoned, shot three more times, castrated, and then drowned in a river. This was after being stabbed in the stomach two years previous. The details of his murder have been exaggerated, but only slightly (he was not castrated, and he was dead before being thrown in the river). But his brutal death has only helped to cement his status as a crazy, mystical, villainous badass. That reputation has led to Rasputin being portrayed as the antagonist in a number of movies, ranging from the animated Anastasia movie from 1997 to the film we are looking at here, Hellboy. Directed by Guillermo del Toro and starring America's Caveman, Ron Perlman, Hellboy tells the story of a demon who is raised to be a defender of Good. Working as part of the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense, Hellboy and his companions do battle not only with Rasputin, but also a mechanized Nazi assassin named Kroenen, a reincarnating hellhound named Sammael, and a giant, tentacled behemoth that threatens to destroy the world. It is a dark movie, but it is also full of snappy dialogue, fun action setpieces, dark comedy, and a surprising amount of heart. Speaking of heart, I absolutely love Old Rasputin. It is one of the best all-around Russian Imperial Stouts out there. Even if you aren't going to drink it while watching Hellboy, it's worth checking out for the sheer deliciousness of it. It is rich and luscious, big and bold, complex and decadent. If you are a stout drinker, you probably already know about this one. If you're not, Old Rasputin might make you change your mind about that. Like with Rasputin himself, there's something mystical in the murky depths of this oily brew. And, like our pal Hellboy, it's not evil, it just looks like it might be.
Movie Tagline: NONE
Band of Outsiders, or Bande à part, is a French New Wave film starring iconic actress and Godard muse Anna Karina as Odile, a language student who gets pulled into a robbery plot by two men, Franz and Arthur. It doesn't have much as far as plot goes, but what makes this and most other New Wave films stand out is not plot but style. Godard's characters are just so cool. It doesn't matter what they are doing, they make it look good. That's one of the reasons why Band of Outsiders is one of Jean-Luc Godard's most accessible films, and why many have even called it his best. This claim of being the best Godard film is what makes it such a good movie to pair with Apotheosis, a French Saison from the Urban Chestnut Brewing Company. The word "apotheosis" is defined as the highest point in the development of something. It is a culmination, and as such it perfectly describes how many feel about Band of Outsiders. It is the perfect example of French New Wave Cinema. From the race through the Louvre, to the "Madison dance" scene, to a minute of silence where even the soundtrack drops out, the movie exhibits such an effortless style that it is absolutely irresistible. Apotheosis is a somewhat atypical beer coming from Urban Chestnut. They split their beers into two main categories: Reverence Series and Revolution Series. Reverence for Old World styles and Revolution for modern craft styles. Apotheosis is a Reverence beer, naturally, but whereas most Reverence beers are German-style beers (Zwickel, Schnickelfritz, Schlossturm, Oachkatzlschwoaf), this one is a French-style beer. Highly carbonated, with a pleasantly fruity, spicy aroma and taste, this saison boasts a nice dry finish to tempt you into another drink. Apotheosis, I think it is safe to say, is not the best example of a saison out there. It is very tasty, but there are other, better ones to try. The same could very easily be said about Band of Outsiders. It may be the favorite of many people, but there are other Godard movies to check out as well. Don't limit yourself to just one. The fun lies in trying lots of different saisons, in watching a handful of French New Wave films, and seeing which ones speak to you personally.
Movie Tagline: The vacation you'll never forget -- no matter how hard you try
When you think of Jamaica, you think of Red Stripe (as far as beer goes, anyway). With their laid-back vibe and their "Hooray Beer" advertisements, the folks at Red Stripe have worked hard to indelibly link their product with thoughts of relaxing on a beach in the Caribbean. Unfortunately, the Red Stripe we drink here in the United States is not made in Jamaica. It is made in the not-so-tropical climates of La Crosse, Wisconsin and Latrobe, Pennsylvania. This isn't a bad thing (if anything, it means you get fresher beer), it just puts a slight dent in that whole island vibe Red Stripe tries to promote. It also dovetails nicely with the plot of Club Paradise, wherein a movie set on a (fictitious) Caribbean island stars such noted island dwellers as Robin Williams, Peter O'Toole, Rick Moranis, and Twiggy. Sure, it also has Jimmy Cliff, but his storyline takes a back seat to the antics of, among other things, two scrawny white guys trying (and failing) to get laid. But the point of this post is not to decry the unfairness of whitewashing in Hollywood movies. If it was, there are better, more current examples of this to choose from. Club Paradise is not the place to draw the line. The movie was such a flop that you would be hard-pressed to find many people today who even remember it. And I'm not here to tell you it's a hidden gem of 80s comedy. It's really not. It's a mess of a movie, with a dozen or so funny people failing to be funny in any discernible way. But I'll be damned if I don't find it oddly charming. Maybe it's just nostalgia, but no movie with Peter O'Toole and Robin Williams can be all bad, even if O'Toole was nominated for a Razzie because of his performance in this one. There's something about this feature-length failed SCTV skit that just does it for me. It's a similar reaction many people have to Red Stripe. They know deep down that there's nothing special about it; it's just another bland macro lager (owned by Heineken as of 2015). But drinking one takes them back to that time they vacationed in Jamaica, and all the good times they had, and all the interesting people they met, and by some strange alchemy the beer tastes better than it should. So, maybe a similar thing will happen when you pair Red Stripe with Club Paradise. Alone, they are both middling products, but together they may transcend their shortcomings and provide you with a much needed two-hour vacation. It's not Jamaica, but it's as close as some of us are ever going to get.
Movie Tagline: When the smoke clears, it just means he's reloading
A pistolero is a gunman, a killer. A bandit who lives and dies by the gun. El Mariachi, the former-musician-turned-gunslinger, is such a man. In fact, Desperado was originally titled El Pistolero. The name was more in line with the original movie (El Mariachi), but the studio requested it be changed because, you know, they like to assert unnecessary control over things. But, whatever its title, Desperado remains an action-packed homage to the films of Sergio Leone and Sam Peckinpah (with a healthy dose of John Woo thrown in for good measure), rife with operatic gunfights and ultra-violence. Whereas Peckinpah and Leone used violence to make a point about the corruption of humanity or the brutality of the world, Robert Rodriguez is more interested in pure entertainment. There is no greater message to Desperado, no overarching themes of retribution and redemption. This is action for the sake of action. It is unapologetically gratuitous, right down to the over-the-top, telenovela-style sex scene between Antonio Banderas and Salma Hayek complete with soft focus, sexy Latin guitar music, and a ludicrous amount of candles. Just as Rodriguez continues the fine tradition of ultra-violence that Peckinpah pioneered, so too does Excel Brewing continue the tradition of making a Vienna-Style Lager with a Mexican twist. While nearly extinct in its native land, the Vienna Lager continues to thrive in Mexico, and while authentic examples are increasingly difficult to find, there are still some quality ones to be found. Similar to a Märzen but lighter and more bitter, the Vienna Lager is a refreshing, highly-drinkable beer, and El Pistolero is a fantastic illustration of this. El Pistolero is a seasonal beer from Excel Brewing, an offshoot of the Excel Bottling Company, a "Mom & Pop" soda maker out of Breese, Illinois, most famously known for their Ski Original. The story goes that Excel was founded in 1936 from reward money obtained from catching a bank robber, with Ski coming in 1961 and firmly planting Excel as a Southern Illinois mainstay. With the addition of a brewery in 2012, Excel is committed to making quality beverages for children and adults alike, all the while keeping their operation small and independent. That same independent spirit is what makes Excel pair so well with Robert Rodriguez. Not one for the mainstream, Rodriguez makes movies he wants to make, the way he wants to make them. His first feature, El Mariachi, was made for a paltry $7000, some of which Rodriguez raised by participating in medical testing studies. Rodriguez resigned from the DGA in 2004 due to an issue with the directing credit on Sin City, and these days he makes films via his own studio in Austin, Texas, known as Troublemaker Studios. He is all about DIY filmmaking, frequently serving as editor, sound editor, director of photography, camera operator, steadicam operator, composer, production designer, visual effects supervisor, screenwriter, and director. If it's adventure and excitement you're after, look no further than the works of Robert Rodriguez. And if you need something to wash down all that ultra-violence, look no further than Excel Brewing.
Movie Tagline: Not every gift is a blessing
If you haven't seen The Sixth Sense by now, then you really shouldn't be reading this. But, also, I can't think of many other movies that have been spoiled as thoroughly as this one, so I doubt it much matters anymore. Psycho, I guess. That one's pretty spoiled (and if it wasn't before, it will be as soon as you click that link). I had my own run-in with people who couldn't keep their mouths shut with this one, but that was in 1999. Seventeen years ago, if I want to make myself feel really old. But, spoilers aside, these pairings are meant to enhance your enjoyment of the movie, not detract from it, so if you don't know and don't want to know what the deal is with The Sixth Sense, I suggest you skip this one. Anyway, if you're still reading, you know what The Sixth Sense is about. Kid sees dead people. John McClane tries to help. John McClane is a ghost. Credits. It took the world by storm, and rocketed its young lead, Haley Joel Osment, to stardom. To call this movie a sleeper hit doesn't even begin to describe just how under the radar it was. According to IMDb, Entertainment Weekly's Summer Movie Preview of 1999 (which listed 134 other films) didn't even mention The Sixth Sense. Even The Blair Witch Project got a mention in that list, and that was the sleeper to end all sleepers. And, yes, I'm sure the twist ending was what made the movie the event that it was, but before you get to the twist there's a whole beautiful, dark, twisted movie to get through. Given the landscape of horror movies in 1999, it's amazing how subdued and patient this one is. This was the year of Jan de Bont's The Haunting; of Lake Placid; of Stigmata; of The Rage: Carrie 2. The Sixth Sense could have ended up like any of these movie disgraces, but the talent of its young writer/director and the solid performances of its cast helped elevate it to high art. Unfortunately, M. Night Shyamalan has since squandered most of the good will this movie earned him, with his signature twist endings yielded lower returns with each passing attempt. He seems to be taking some baby steps toward repairing his reputation, but time will be the ultimate judge. Just as Shyamalan has to regain the trust of his viewing audience, so too does Rogue Ales & Spirits have to occasionally remind people that they are more than just a brewery coasting by on their name and a few gimmicky beers. Things were all good in the 90s for Rogue, with their Dead Guy Ale being one of the ultimate expressions of what craft beer was capable of. And you have to admire their insistence on growing their own ingredients, from barley and hops, to pumpkins and hazelnuts, to honey bees and free-range chickens. But sometimes Rogue seems to get lost in their own sense of awesomeness, just like M. Night. They start doing things like collaborating with Voodoo Doughnut to make beers like their Bacon Maple Ale, or the Chocolate Peanut Butter Banana Ale, or the Lemon Chiffon Crueller Ale. They seem to be asking "Can we?" instead of "Should we?" on some of their beers. Which is a shame because when they set out to craft solid, well-made beers like Dead Guy, or Hazelnut Brown, or Chocolate Stout, they can knock it out of the park, no problem. So this pairing is dedicated to two potential masters of their respective crafts, both of whom walk a fine line between art and kitsch. They are both capable of amazing things, as they have proven numerous times in the past, but they have to resist their own worst impulses in order to keep from slipping into self-parody. So toast to them and hope they keep up the good work.
Movie Tagline: Four perfect killers. One perfect crime. Now all they have to fear is each other.
I've been having some real issues with taglines as of late, so let me get this out of the way right now: 1. They are not perfect killers, they are thieves. Maybe just call them criminals in general, but definitely not perfect killers. 2. There are six of them, not four. Mr. Blue, Mr. Pink, Mr. Brown, Mr. White, Mr. Orange, and Mr. Blonde. Yes, two of them are only in the movie for a short time, but they still count. 3. This crime was not perfect; it was an absolute disaster. That's the whole point of the movie. If it was the perfect crime, there wouldn't be an issue. 4. They have a lot more to fear than each other. Like, the cops. They should be afraid of the cops showing up and arresting or shooting everyone. Anyway, I feel better. Let's get on with it. This week we're looking at Reservoir Dogs, the debut feature of America's favorite foot fetishist, Quentin Tarantino. With a reported budget of $1.2 million, Tarantino's crime thriller tells the story of a botched jewelry heist committed by five professional criminals and one undercover police officer. It uses a disjointed narrative structure that goes back and forth between the aftermath of and scenes leading up to the heist, while never actually showing the heist. It features rapid-fire dialogue, bloody violence, tons of pop culture references (with a particular fondness for movies and music from the 70s), and the trunk shot. All in all, it is a perfect showcase of Tarantino's modus operandi. It is fitting, then, that it pairs so well with Ska Brewing's Modus Hoperandi, a beer whose label looks like a Reservoir Dogs reference all its own. From its deep golden color to its piney, grapefruity smell, this beer is the work of someone who knows what they are doing. Someone who loves beer the way Tarantino loves movies. With a blast of hops up front that give way to a balanced, smooth finish, it is everything you want in an American IPA. While Modus offers a smooth finish, I can't say the same for Reservoir Dogs. But, then again, nothing goes smoothly for these unlucky crooks. But that doesn't mean you can't enjoy watching them bicker and fight and accuse one another of being rats. Just do so with a Modus Hoperandi in your hand and everything will go smoothly for you. Because drinking Ska beer is a hell of a lot better than listening to ska music.
Movie Tagline: A New-England Folktale
Mephistopheles, named after a demon from German folklore, is an Imperial Stout from Avery's The Demons of Ale series. According to their website, "Mephistopheles is the crafty shapeshifter, the second fallen angel; he who does not love light. Herein he patiently lies, waiting and willing to do your bidding, but for a price. Enter into his darkness, a tangled and intricate labyrinth of bittersweet rapture." That is a solid description of Mephistopheles, but it is also a decent enough description of The Witch. The directorial debut of Robert Eggers, The Witch tells the story of an exiled family of Puritans in 1630s New England. They are isolated at the edge of a foreboding, impassable wilderness. Their day-to-day is full of hard work that yields little benefit, and soon things go from bad to worse. With winter approaching, their crops wither and their animal traps remain empty. Throw in the unspeakable evil that hovers all around them and the family soon starts to unravel. Lies are told, trust is questioned, and loved ones are lost. For Thomasin, the family's eldest daughter, all of this could lead to her being sent away to live with another family. And that's really the best case scenario for her. We, the viewers, see the events of the movie largely through her young eyes, and it is difficult to watch as her family slowly turns on her. Even harder to watch are the short bursts of horror that punctuate scenes of building dread. This is the kind of movie that will have you squirming in your seat as you watch it through your fingers. One way to make the terror on your screen easier to handle is to get good and buzzed while you watch it. Thankfully, Mephistopheles is somewhere in the neighborhood of 16% ABV (it varies from year to year). Even sold as a 12oz single, that's plenty for one person. It pours like motor oil and smells like roasted coffee and molasses with a potent boozy aroma that comes through in the taste. Indeed, this is a demon of a beer. It is sweet, but never cloyingly so. It is bold and boozy, intense and aggressive, but also balanced and delicious. Its nature is to seduce and eventually overcome you, making it the perfect beer to drink while watching the provocatively evil The Witch.
Movie Tagline: Bombed out in space with a spaced-out bomb!
Dark Star is John Carpenter's first feature film. Some of it is adapted from Ray Bradbury, other bits are taken from Philip K. Dick, and the rest is thrown together as cheaply and quickly as possible. The special effects were cheap in 1974, and they have not aged well. This is largely due to the movie originally existing as a student film. As you might have inferred, this is not his best work. It is silly, and weird, and extremely dated. But it still bears the mark of John Carpenter, mostly in the score, and that makes it worth checking out. Carpenter rarely makes a perfect movie, but they are always unique and chock full of interesting ideas. Also unique is the beer style known as Kölsch. Now, a true Kölsch is a top-fermented beer (made with ale yeast) that has been lagered (cold-fermented) over a long period of time. It is the local brew of the city of Cologne. There are only about two dozen breweries located in and around Cologne that may legally call their beers Kölsch. Everyone else has to use the term "Kölsch-style" for their versions. And, in the case of Bur Oak's Dark Star, it is called a Black Kölsch-style Ale. Now that's all kinds of confusing, considering that Kölsch is not an ale, but a lager. It is simply brewed with ale yeast. And adding dark malt does somewhat overpower the classic estery, spicy Kölsch flavor. But that doesn't make it an unpleasant drinking experience. What it does is make it taste more like a Schwarzbier. Like the traditional Kölsch flavor gets lost a bit in Dark Star (the beer), John Carpenter's uniqueness gets lost a bit in Dark Star (the movie). It comes off as just another Hippies in Space movie (and believe me, there are more of them than you might think). And Dark Star, while not the first commercially released beer from this young brewery, is a good start for Bur Oak. Like Carpenter, they don't blow your mind right off the bat, but they have the potential to make a mark in craft beer the way he did in the movie business. So keep an eye out for them; their next beer could be their Halloween. Or, at the very least, their Big Trouble In Little China. |
AboutThis is the page where the pairings live. They are over there, to the left of what you are currently reading. I don't know how you missed them. Archives
August 2016
Categories
All
|